Just for you Dawn!

I can't believe I'm putting the journaling here for my Santa letter but Dawn says she can't read it. Hopefully Santa has so many he won't get to mine right away! :) Having fun "pretending" to be the bad girl!
Dear Santa,
I have been a really super good girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at the office Christmas party. It was Richie who spiked the punch with too much Bourbon. I can't help it if I drank 7 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like vanilla.
I thought it was funny when I put Merridy's sweater on my head and danced the chicken dance on the table while singing `Santa Claus Is Coming to Town'. I didn't mean to break Noli's iPod and don't know why Lisa would sue me for assault & battery.
I don't remember calling George's wife an extraordinary sheep---even though she looked like one with pink eye shadow and yellow lipstick!
And when I threw up on Tamara's husband's fanny, it was only because I ate too much of that lasagna.
After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Jetta through my neighbor's bathroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a phenomenal skunk and have me arrested for breaking and entering!
So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all spectacular and catastrophic. And I'm really not to blame for any of this gargantuan stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!
Sincerely and lovingly yours,Gaye (Really a nice girl!)
P.S. It's only $2700 bucks!